Let me be clear, this is not a scientific approach that
works 100% of the time or for 100% of guys. This is simply an exercise designed
to help stimulate some self-analysis in your journal & discussion with your
Paul moving forward.
Find an emotion on the wheel.
The emotion on the exact opposite side of the wheel is the
root cause driving your emotions. Satisfy THAT, and the void will be filled and
the emotion that you’re currently feeling will abate.
Let’s look at Samson as an example. In Judges 15:1-5 Samson
learns that his wife has been given away
by her father to one of the groomsmen from his wedding. He responded in
great anger, tying 300 foxes together by their tails in pairs & putting a
torch between them! And who wouldn’t respond in such a way am I right?!
Anyway, on the opposite side of the emotion wheel from
anger, you’ll find respected, worthwhile, appreciated, and valuable. We’re not
sure exactly what Samson WASN’T feeling . . . which drove him toward what he
WAS feeling, but it seems logical enough to at least prompt a conversation.
So now with you . . .
First exercise:
Find your negative ‘go to’ emotion on the wheel (for Samson
this was Anger).
What is on the opposite side of the wheel? Assume there’s
something to this for a minute and consider the possibility that THAT might be
the root cause of what’s going on with you.
Second exercise:
What do you feel when you consume pornography or sexual
images or masturbate?
Find those emotions on the wheel. Then look at the opposite
side of the wheel. Is it plausible that THOSE emotions are contributing to your
drive for lustful things?
Again, this is not always going to be exact. But I’ve seen
this work enough times to know that it’s not good to simply dismiss this
approach and move on. Consider the exercise and do some deep thinking &
consideration of this over the coming days/weeks.
Peel back your layers.
Thoughts to Journal/Pray:
- What root emotions are you being highlighted by this
exercise? What level of truth might lie with this exercise?
- What do you think drives your usage of pornography? What
need do you think you’re satisfying? What are some alternative ways to satisfy
those needs?
Reading:
Judges 15