Day 41: Emotion pt. 3 - Ogres are like onions (START)

Ah Shrek . . . such wisdom. Great movie & a great scene. Ogres are like onions.


Onions have layers; ogres have layers.

Even though we may not like to admit it, we all have layers. Some of us are just more verbal about those layers than others. And some of us have deep layers while others have shallow layers. But we all have something lying beneath the surface, driving our behavior. Something we’re addressing . . . satisfying . . . whether we know it or not.

Take a quick look at the emotions wheel from the other day & then let’s look at the next chapter in Samson’s story. 

Let me be clear, this is not a scientific approach that works 100% of the time or for 100% of guys. This is simply an exercise designed to help stimulate some self-analysis in your journal & discussion with your Paul moving forward.

Find an emotion on the wheel.

The emotion on the exact opposite side of the wheel is the root cause driving your emotions. Satisfy THAT, and the void will be filled and the emotion that you’re currently feeling will abate.

Let’s look at Samson as an example. In Judges 15:1-5 Samson learns that his wife has been given away  by her father to one of the groomsmen from his wedding. He responded in great anger, tying 300 foxes together by their tails in pairs & putting a torch between them! And who wouldn’t respond in such a way am I right?!

Anyway, on the opposite side of the emotion wheel from anger, you’ll find respected, worthwhile, appreciated, and valuable. We’re not sure exactly what Samson WASN’T feeling . . . which drove him toward what he WAS feeling, but it seems logical enough to at least prompt a conversation.

So now with you . . .

First exercise:

Find your negative ‘go to’ emotion on the wheel (for Samson this was Anger).

What is on the opposite side of the wheel? Assume there’s something to this for a minute and consider the possibility that THAT might be the root cause of what’s going on with you.

Second exercise:

What do you feel when you consume pornography or sexual images or masturbate?

Find those emotions on the wheel. Then look at the opposite side of the wheel. Is it plausible that THOSE emotions are contributing to your drive for lustful things?

Again, this is not always going to be exact. But I’ve seen this work enough times to know that it’s not good to simply dismiss this approach and move on. Consider the exercise and do some deep thinking & consideration of this over the coming days/weeks.

Peel back your layers.


Thoughts to Journal/Pray:

  1. What root emotions are you being highlighted by this exercise? What level of truth might lie with this exercise?
  2. What do you think drives your usage of pornography? What need do you think you’re satisfying? What are some alternative ways to satisfy those needs?



Judges 15